Broken and Healed
by luv-blonde-bunny
Summary: Every story shows that the heroin falls for the White Knight - they never said anything about the Knight loving her back. A story about couping when the one you love maybe isn't the one you get.
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: Hello to everyone once again. It's been a while since I took down all my stories. Sorry to previous fans. I just didn't think it right to have them up when there was no hope for me to update them any time soon. Things have, hopefully, changed. I'm forcing myself to turn out one new chapter every weekend, so hopefully these stories will actually come along faster. That does mean that some of the chapters probably won't be very long or amazing (what can you do when you're pressed or time or have writer's block and have to write?) but I'm going to cross my fingers and hope these still turn out decent. So without further ado, here's my recent story idea – a Sora/Riku fanfiction with a heap-load of other fun hooks and not so favored hooks (but deal with it or stop reading).

Warnings: if you read my author's note then you're already informed that this is **YAOI!** As in **BOY-SMOOCHING-BOY** (and maybe other stuff) **ACTION!** If you still don't understand I really suggest you leave this story – I'm not going to be called out by your parents because you don't have half a brain. **Other warnings include** hooks that may or may not be favored of both the homosexual and heterosexual variety (sorry, I just don't do yuri, not opposed to lesbians, but for me it's kind of like walking in on my parents – I may know they have sex but I really don't want to see it). Also **language** will probably be an issue too – for those of you who prefer your yaoi romances to be less graphic or filled with "naughty words"…well pick another story, there's literally millions.

Disclaimer: I'm not connected to Disney, or Playstation, or those Final Fantasy creators or whoever else went into the making of this game so I have no rights to the characters or the original story. My only claim is to this particular story idea. Thank you.

Now that all the crap's outta the way, here's the first chapter of "Broken and Healed".

**Chapter One – **The Setting for the Story

"Geez, Sora! What took you so long" came the questioning voice of one of his best friends.

"Hey, Kairi. Waiting long? Sorry, but Riku called me just before I left and we chatted for a bit" he said, blushing slightly.

"What'd you do Sora, faint at the mere sound of his voice?"

"Very funny, Kairi", Sora exclaimed, giving Kairi a slight shove. Kairi just laughed and hugged him in apology. It was times like this he loved his friend…

"So what did Riku want? Did he confess his undying love for you or did you beat him to it?"

…And times like this that made him hate her.

Ever since Sora had confessed to Kairi why he couldn't go out with her she hadn't left him alone about it. Kairi, Sora, and Riku had been the best of friends since they were little and Sora had been surprised when Kairi had told him she liked him more than just as a friend.

/-\FLASH BACK \-/

"Quit it, Sora! This is serious! I have something important to tell you" Kairi nearly screamed at him and a few frustrated tears gathered in her eyes. If Sora didn't stop teasing her ( it turned out she'd looked like she was injured when she'd tried to wiggle her body in an imitation of what she thought would look sexy) then she'd never be able to tell him that…

"Oh man, I'm sorry Kairi. I didn't mean to make you cry! Come on – you can tell me. What is it?" Sora got closer to place a comforting hand on her shoulder as the water sloshed around them, stirring the refractions of light that played over her white swim suit and his bare chest.

Kairi blushed nervously at the contact and decided that it was now or never. She was pretty sure Sora liked her and she knew, beyond any doubt, that she loved Sora more than anything. 'What if he doesn't…. NO! Don't think like that! Just do it now or you'll never know!' With that in mind, Kairi pushed forward and quickly placed a light kiss on Sora's cheek, as close to his lips as she could get without actually touching them. She wanted to kiss him, but couldn't bring herself to do that until she knew he and her were for sure.

As she pulled back, Kairi didn't dare even look at Sora. Her blush had deepened and she thanked God that the secluded waterfall area was darkened by shadow in the early afternoon, due to the fact that the sun hadn't yet reached high enough in the sky that it topped the giant cliff the waterfall flowed from.

"S-sora…I," she took a deep breath, her eyes roaming everywhere but up to his face, "I l-like you. I mean REALLY like you. Do you think, you maybe, kind of, like me too," she asked as she backed away ever so slightly and began to fidget with her fingers.

"…Kairi…" Sora said in a gentle, hesitant voice, that left no doubt as to what he was about to say.

One word; that was all he'd had to say. Kairi could hear it plain as day: he didn't like her like that. He wasn't going to want to kiss her. They weren't going to go out. They would never get married. He…he would never love her like… like she loved him…. One word took the place of so many others.

Tears gathered in her eyes rapidly without her noticing, until she heard Sora begging her not to cry and holding her tightly - in some attempt to will away the pain, she suspected.

"I'm SO sorry, Kairi. I…I can't. I just can't. Please, PLEASE don't hate me…I'm so sorry…"

For a while they stood in the warm water under the waterfall, Sora holding her even after her tears had finally faded. Kairi was the first to move, and she gently pushed Sora away – far enough so she could look him square in the face. She just stared into his eyes, trying to see something that might answer the questions now plaguing her mind and soul. But he just stared back, confused and concerned, but willing to wait for her to move first.

"Sora", she started and looked down water as she said her piece, "I don't understand. I…I really thought you did like me like that. I-" she cut off as her voice threatened to close on the lump forming there, but she shoved Sora away this time when he moved to hold her again. "No! I HAVE to say this! …I don't know what to think right now, but I can tell that you're not telling me something. Its okay" she said hurriedly as Sora made to speak. "You don't have to explain anything to me, and to be honest, right 

now I don't want to hear it. I need some time to get heal before I start wanting to know your deep dark secrets, okay?" She finally looked up to give him a watery smile. "I don't hate you Sora. I'm just…lost, right now, and need some time. Give me some time Sora. I don't want to speak to you when I'm all…like this" she said, gesturing vaguely to herself, "so just…give me some time", and with that she'd left. She'd been able to restrain her tears all through the time it took her to row the boat from the island back to the main land. Once there she'd ran all the way to her house, locked herself in her room and cried all over again.

/-\END FLASHBACK \-/

It had taken Kairi a full week before she'd stand to be near him again, let alone speak to him. Once Kairi had been able to pull herself together somewhat, it hadn't taken her long to wheedle out of him the reason he wouldn't date her. It had been simple really.

Sora was in love with Riku. Had always been, probably always would be.

Kairi hadn't been able to take this quite as well. It was one thing thinking another girl had stolen Sora's heart, or that he just wasn't ready for a relationship yet, or she'd have even accepted that he just didn't see her in that way. It was another thing entirely to have to face the idea that she would have never been an option for him because she wasn't the 'right' sex. Three weeks of silence may have been a little harsh, she later admitted, but she had honestly needed that long to get out that self pitying state where she hated herself for being stupid and hated the world for still spinning while her entire world seemed to have been flipped on its axis. But, by the end of this time she had come around enough to talk with him almost like old times. When he'd asked her about it she'd shrugged and, refusing to meet his eye, had replied "who wouldn't fall in love with their "white night"?

This had been what Kairi had insisted on calling Riku ever since the horrible incident when they'd been ten and Riku had been twelve. There had been a really bad storm one night. It had come upon the island on a day that had previously been very nice with not a cloud in the sky, so Sora's family had decided to go out and enjoy a day on the boat. Sora, who was still afraid of drowning after the last time his older brother, Cloud, had pushed him off the boat, had pleaded off going so they left him at home to be babysat by Leon, Cloud's best friend. While Leon had fallen asleep in front of the TV, Sora had been watching it still when the weather warning had popped up on the screen. He'd immediately become afraid for his family and rushed outside and down to the beach, staring out through the storm from the sandy shore. He'd been looking for his parents' boat, anxiously searching the coast for any sign of it floating off shore.

He hadn't spotted them, but Riku, who had been anxious when he'd seen some of the houses loosing power, had thought to run over to check on Sora. He'd known the younger boy was alone except for Leon and that Sora, who hated thunder storms, hated the dark even more. On his way there Riku had spotted the boy lying on the sand, bleeding slighting from a cut on his forehead where some loose branch, caught by the strong winds, had struck Sora, knocking him unconscious.

Riku had dragged Sora under the bridge that led out to the Poupi Island and there they'd waited out the storm with Riku tending to Sora's wound as best as a twelve year old without proper instruction could have. When they'd been found the next morning 

and moved to the local hospital, Sora had been told the horrible truth – the storm had scuttled his parents' ship and the only survivor had been his fifteen year old brother.

Riku had stayed with Sora the entire time and the doctors had said that it was a good thing that Riku had come along when he had. With the way the tide had been moving so terribly, the likelihood that Sora, in his unconscious state, could have been swept out to sea and drowned had been high. So Kairi had said that he was Sora's White Knight, come to save the damsel in so much distress – had saved his life and there for him when he'd lost most of his family.

Kairi didn't really know if that was what had sparked Sora's love for the silver haired boy, and Sora wasn't saying anything in the affirmative or negative. Oh, of course he wasn't going to tell her that what had really done it for him had been the day Riku had stood up to Cloud on his behalf. Cloud always picked on him and Sora knew that Riku respected his older brother, so he'd been completely astounded when Riku had suddenly interrupted one of Cloud's verbal bullyings of Sora and had told the blonde to shove off, in no uncertain terms. This had been before the accident, and so while the fact that Riku saved his life hadn't started his feelings for Riku, it certainly had helped them grow quickly.

"Heellooo! Earth to Sora, come in Sora".

"Wha-? Oops, sorry Kairi", Sora blushed as he realized he'd been caught spacing out.

"Well the next time you decide you're going to go off to your own little world at least answer my question first" she said with a light giggle. "Now come on! You can fill me in on Riku and your's conversation on our way to the beach. The others are probably already there and about ready to kill us for being so late!" With that she grabbed his hand and they ran laughing to meet up with their friends.


	2. And the Sun Crashed into the Sea

Alright everyone! I know so far my promise to update every weekend seems lost, however I want you to know that since I didn't update last weekend, I'm endeavoring to make it up to you all by posting **Two chapters** this weekend. You heard me, two of them. So, sit back and enjoy, this is second installment of _Broken and Healed_.

**Warnings!!** This is a **yaoi!! **That means this has a **boy. kissing. another. boy!!** If that doesn't clear things up for you, **leave this story**. Seriously, I'm not joking, get out. Don't stupidly force yourself to read a guy making out with another guy just to then turn around and complain to your parents and the site. That being covered, there will also probably be language and anything from **implied gay sex/heterosexual sex** to **outright** sex. If this is too much for some of you, again, I'd suggest either backing out or just skipping those sorts of scenes. I'm not one for needless page breaks, but for those peoples sensibilities I'll consent to giving a warning before any sort of outright sex scenes, okay?

**Disclaimer:** Basically a statement about how I never have and never will own any of the characters or original Kingdom Hearts' story line's copyrights or anything like that. To whomever does own this, you're amazingly lucky, but to the rest of you, it's not me whose the owner nor am I making any sort of profit off of this. The only part of this entire thing that is mine is this particular story plot that I'm using them in.

Now with the preliminaries out of the way we can move on to the real purpose you're all here . Enjoy!!

)(5)(4)(3)(2)(1)(0)(

**Chapter Two – **And the Sun Crashed into the Sea

Sora and Kairi had chosen to walk to the beach since it was only a few blocks away, but that still meant that by the time they got there, the rest of their friends – minus Riku – were already there waiting for them. As they approached the small group on the beach, a sandy-haired boy who had been digging through the cooler under the parasol looked up at them and began to wave.

"Hey guys! What took you so long? Hey Wakka, Selphie, get over here" Tidus shouted to the other two that were over tossing around Wakka's Blitz ball. Selphie gave a happy shout and ran over to join them under the parasol, while Wakka quickly grabbed his Blitz ball from where she'd tossed it in her excitement. He gave a jerk of his head by way of greeting as he joined them all.

"Hey Tidus, guys, sorry it took so long" said Sora sheepishly while rubbing the back of his head.

"Don' worry about it, man. We got to have some fun even though you guys weren't here" said Wakka in his thick island accent.

"Yeah, but where's Riku? Wasn't he coming with you guys" asked Selphie with a worried frown.

"Yeah, me and Sora talked about that on the way over; apparently he's decided to bail on today. Says he's got something important to do and can't get out of it" said Kairi with a shrug and wearing an expression that clearly asked 'what can you do'.

"More important than spending the last few moments of our precious summer break together" shouted Tidus incredulously. The rest of the group stared at Tidus, dumbstruck for a moment before Sora finally responded. "Tidus, what are you talking about?! Summer break only just started. We don't go back for months!"

"Dudes, I counted it and we only have twelve weeks! Only twelve weeks" he exclaimed, sounding like some tragedy had just occurred. The rest of the group shared a look before bursting out laughing, unable to maintain a straight face in light of their friend's perceived "plight".

"On man Tidus, keep dat kinda depressing stuff to yourself next time", said Wakka with a shake of his head, but smiling all the same. "Well come on den. We got food, tunes, a ball and we're all here at da beach. Let's start havin' some fun" said Wakka happily.

"Yeah" they all shouted joyfully.

)()()()()()()(

"Woo-hoo! Go Tidus" Kairi cheered as she watched Tidus and Wakka holding a mock fight. Sora and she had decided to sit this one out and watch the game while Selphie acted as referee and the other two boys played a round. They'd begged off this game, claiming they were too tired from the previous swimming, the many rounds of mock-Blitz Ball and volley ball. Not to mention all the dancing they'd been doing in between hand. They definitely weren't faking their fatigue, but Kairi still had another reason for having wanted to sit out with Sora.

"So" said Kairi, quietly enough that the other three wouldn't hear her, "gonna tell me what you're not?"

"That doesn't make any sense Kairi" said Sora, pretending to pay attention to the match, trying to postpone answering her.

"Are you going to tell me what you two talked about other than Riku not coming with us?" Sora shrugged.

"I thought about it, but I'm not sure I want to get my hopes up" he muttered looking down at the large beach towel they were sharing.

"Come on Sora, who else are you gonna talk to about this? The only other person that knows about you being gay is your cousin Roxas. Not even Cloud knows and he's openly gay! What's so bad about talking to me about your relationship trouble?"

"There's nothing wrong with talking to you but…well," he gave a sigh and took a drink from his soda bottle before continuing, "He told me that he wants to talk to me in private about something, something important…later…in the forest between our houses," he muttered, looking at the bottle clenched in his hands. It took Kairi a moment to process this before she responed.

"I don't understand", she said finally, "That sounds like a good thing, but you look miserable. Shouldn't you be shouting for joy? He might want to tell you that he likes you."

"But what if he's not" asked Sora quietly, "What if it's something else entirely and I go there with my hopes up, do something stupid like confess to him and…just get let down…" his voice trailed off as he realized what kind of scene he'd just painted.

He didn't want to confess and be turned down…

_Like you._

The words didn't need to be spoken and Sora saw Kairi wince and stiffen out of the corner of his eye. She turned and seemed to watch the fight some more. They didn't speak for a while but finally Kairi, still watching the game, broke the silence.

"You'll survive….It won't be pleasant but, well…it won't kill you." She didn't sound happy at all and Sora regretted having said anything. He opened his mouth, about to tell her to just forget he mentioned it, but she continued before he could.

"You should be happy", she said in a much stronger tone, but he noticed she still wasn't looking at him, "because if you're right then your joy will be even greater, your hopes being confirmed and all. And if you're wrong…well at least you'll know the truth won't you? You can deal after that. It's harder, I think, trying to get by when you don't know where you stand and, while it's not pleasant, sometimes knowing this can help you to walk forward", she said and finally looked at him with sad eyes and a small smile.

Sora reached down and grasped her hand lightly in his.

"I'm sorry Kairi."

Kairi didn't respond but her smile did become a little stronger as she shook her head at him and just turned her eyes back to the game. "I understand. It's your White Knight."

They continued to hold hands without speaking a word until the game finally finished. Tidus won and Kairi cheered loudly for him. Maybe he should be happy. Even though it wasn't a conscious thought, or a hope he wished to indulge, he couldn't help that a part of him started to think that maybe Kairi was right – maybe he should hope for the best. After all, didn't the fairy princess and her White Knight always live happily ever after?

)()()()()()()(

"Aw come on, can't we stay just a little longer" pleaded Selphie as they all worked on packing things up.

"No way, Selph. The tides goin' down and so's the sun. It's getting cold and late, and I don't know about you but I could go for some real food" said Tidus as he put the last of the beach chairs away in the bed of Wakka's truck.

"Yeah Selphie, Tidus be right. We gotta head back now before da suns gone and we start gettin' cold", said Wakka as he put the stereo away in the cab of the truck.

"Alright", said Selphie with a pout. "Hey" she said, suddenly sounding excited again, "Why don't we all go out to eat once we get back to town?" The others shared a doubtful look. "Come on you guys! You said you were hungry and I don't feel like calling it a day just yet. We can go out to eat and then head back home" she begged, using the strongest puppy-look she could. Tidus was the first to cave.

"Yeah, alright; sounds like fun. You in Wakka?" Wakka shrugged the best he could, but there was a wide smile on his face.

"Dats fine by me. What about you two" he asked, turning to Sora and Kairi who had just managed to squeeze all the water-rafts into truck bed, taking up the last of the room. Thankfully there was nothing left to pack away.

"Sorry guys" said Kairi, speaking up for both her and Sora "but me and Sora have plans already. We promised Riku we'd meet him later and give him all kinds of grief for bailing on our party today" she said with a happy grin.

"Yeah right," said Tidus with a smirk, "more like you and Sora want to be alone so you can SMOOOOCH!" He and the others laughed while Sora blushed.

"Aw, Tidus is this your way of expressing your jealousy," replied Kairi with a grin "Well come here, I'll give you a smooch too" she said and proceeded to jokingly chase Tidus who'd started running away in fear, screaming about coodies. Soon enough though they all wound down again, and Sora and Kairi were waving goodbye to Wakka, Tidus and Selphie, who were riding back to town with Wakka.

"We'll call you tomorrow about plans" Selphie shouted back to them.

"Drive safe" called Kairi in return. Both watched as the car drove out of sight.

"So…when are you two supposed to meet" she asked still watching the fading tail lights.

"In about an hour" he said, also watching the road.

"Well then we better get going", Kairi said before she turned around and started walking in the direction of Sora and Riku's houses.

"Wha-?! Wait! Kairi, what are you talking about?!" He hadn't thought she meant to come with him! Kairi just laughed and started running.

"Race you" she called back happily. Sora stood dumbfounded for a moment before a grin split his face. He laughed loudly before quickly taking off after her.

)()()()()()()(

Comments (appreciated), questions (considered), flames (allowed to burn themselves out).


	3. Darkness Throughout the Land

**Author's Note!!** Hey everyone, I guess, not much else to say but here's the next installment, so enjoy! Don't forget to leave a Review!

**Warnings!!** This is a **yaoi!! **That means this has a **boy. kissing. another. boy!!** If that doesn't clear things up for you, **leave this story**. Seriously, I'm not joking, get out. Don't stupidly force yourself to read a guy making out with another guy just to then turn around and complain to your parents and the site. That being covered, there will also probably be language and anything from **implied gay sex/heterosexual sex** to **outright** sex. If this is too much for some of you, again, I'd suggest either backing out or just skipping those sorts of scenes. I'm not one for needless page breaks, but for those peoples sensibilities I'll consent to giving a warning before any sort of outright sex scenes, okay?

**Disclaimer:** Basically a statement about how I never have and never will own any of the characters or original Kingdom Hearts' story line's copyrights or anything like that. To whomever does own this, you're amazingly lucky, but to the rest of you, it's not me whose the owner nor am I making any sort of profit off of this. The only part of this entire thing that is mine is this particular story plot that I'm using them in.

Now with the preliminaries out of the way we can move on to the real reason you're all here . Enjoy!!

)(5)(4)(3)(2)(1)(0)(

**Chapter Three **– Darkness Throughout the Land

By the time Sora and Kairi arrived in front of Sora's house the sun had fully set and the moon was rising. Despite this, the night was still warm, and Sora and Kairi were both sweating and out of breath by the time they got there.

"Beat you" cried Kairi triumphantly as she reached Sora's front yard. Sora merely groaned and flopped down on the ground, trying to catch his breath. Kairi joined him momentarily and they both stayed like that, just watching the few clouds in the sky and staring at what stars were out this early in the evening. The only sounds heard were their breaths, the wind blowing through the palm trees, and the crickets starting up their evening call.

"Hey Sora, you need to move or you're going to be late meeting him" said Kairi quietly. Sora hummed in reply. Kairi sat up slowly and turned to Sora, smiling happily.

"Come on lazy bones, get up. You know you want to go no matter how nervous you are" she said as she tugged on his arm, attempting to drag him into a sitting position. Sora groaned but didn't resist as she pulled him up.

"Now go in there and try not to look too overly happy when he expresses his undying love to you – the last thing I want to happen is me committing murder of your future boyfriend because you were too smug about it" she said with forced joy as she pushed him towards the forest that edged his house.

"Yeah right. I'll try not to look orgasmically happy when he tells me he's harboring a secret crush on the head waitress at the Blue Crush in town." Everyone knew that Riku had gotten over his crush on the blonde waitress that worked there, but Sora still thought about it every now and then. He paused on the edge of the forest, staring at it nervously.

"Hey, Kairi" he said in a hushed voice.

"Yeah?"

"You are going to be here when I come back right?" He knew he sounded nervous and that it was probably a stupid fear, but something was telling him that he might not like whatever it was that Riku was going to say to him in there.

"Yeah, Sora, I'll be here" she responded quietly. He didn't have to look to know that she was smiling lovingly at him; he could hear it in her voice. He gave a brief nod and, saying nothing more, he took off into the forest.

It wasn't really a forest though - in all honesty, it was just a close cluster of trees. Too thick to see through and big enough for he and Riku to have made their own fort in here and play in it when they'd been younger, but not big enough that one could get lost in it or that it took long to cross. So sooner rather than later, Sora found the clearing where Riku and he used to always meet. They still used the place from time to time, but ever since Riku had turned fourteen two years ago, and had started dating, they had found little time or use for this place. They usually only used it now as a place to meet when they had something private and/or important to say to only each other. The others knew about this place, but out of respect they left it alone – plus Riku and Sora had made it clear that they liked having this place be just theirs.

Despite all the warm memories this place brought with it, Sora was feeling anything but warm. He was panicking, but there was a small part of him that was filled with butterflies – hoping beyond hope that Riku really was going to say what Sora had always longed to hear. He sat nervously on a log that they'd used as a chair, and fiddled with the stem of a large palm leaf that had fallen to the ground.

_SNAP!_

The sound of a twig being crunched under feet close by altered Sora to another's presence near the clearing. He dropped the leaf, stood and brushed off his pants nervously.

"Sora" a voice asked quietly across from where Sora stood, just outside of the clearing. Sora didn't respond, waiting – and there he was. Silver hair shining in the small amount of moon light that filter through the tree branches, wearing a black shirt that brought out the paleness of his skin, but had green writing on it the same color as his eyes and donning a pair of snug dark blue jeans that had a small silver chain running from the pocket to one of the belt loops– all in all Riku Mamurra was devastatingly handsome.

Sora's heart took a large jolt and started pounding madly.

"Y-yeah, Riku" he replied, glad that he was standing in a spot that was mostly shadowed so Riku wouldn't see him blushing. Riku smiled and proceeded to walk over to Sora.

"Thanks for meeting me here. Was your guys' day at the beach fun?"

"Yeah. Tidus finally beat Wakka in a match, Selphie tried to beat up Tidus when she found out he stole the last of the strawberry pops and Kairi got sea foam in her hair." Sora mentally congratulated himself for sounding so normal when he was feeling like jumping all over the place. It must not have been all that normal because Riku was looking at him funny.

"What" he said, giving a nervous look, attempting to smile normally.

"Nothing. I was just noticing how much you and Cloud look alike" replied Riku with a grin and a shrug. Sora's smile slipped from his face. He hated that – how happy Riku looked talking about Cloud. Even if he had been mentioned too, it still didn't help his confidence to know that even when Sora was here with him Riku was thinking about Cloud.

"So" Sora said with deliberate force, desperate to change the topic before he got too angry "What did you want to talk about?" Riku looked away at that and Sora was immediately curious. The small part of him that was still clinging on to hope grew a little and started jumping happily. Sora had to remind himself that Riku didn't look too happy – the hopeful part of him ignored this reasoning though.

"Well, you're my best friend Sora and well…I just gotta know that you'll tell me the truth if I tell you something. I've got to know that you're going to tell me how you honestly feel. I mean, we're best friends, and I think we should be able to be honest with each other, right?" Riku said looking earnestly into Sora's eyes, seemingly pleading, but for what Sora couldn't guess.

'Honest? About how I feel?! Okay! I love you!' Sora wanted to shout this out, but the now small part of him that was desperately clinging to reason told him to wait until he knew for certain what Riku was talking about, while the rest of him was fighting to burst out and confess his feelings to Riku.

"I…I don't understand, Riku" he said, looking away, needing the peace of mind, but almost instantly being drawn back to those beautiful sea green irises, "What's this about?"

"Sora…I-" Riku stopped there, seemingly unable to continue. He stepped back and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "Sora", he tried again, avoiding looking Sora in the eye, "…I'm…I think…I think I'm bi," he said quickly, but Sora still heard every word. His heart was pounding that much stronger and his ability to think clearly was almost nonexistent.

"Riku, I -", Sora began only to be cut off by him.

"No, don't. I just – I gotta say this. I just thought you had a right to know since you're my friend and he's your brother and all, and I want you to know that I still want to be friends, and…I just…you don't hate me now do you? I mean, now that you know that I go for guys too" Riku questioned, looking nervous and turning pleading aqua eyes on him.

But Sora wasn't listening. At those words, _he's your brother_, everything going on inside Sora seemed to stop. His body was subtly shaking, but he wasn't aware of it. He noticed vaguely that he could almost feel a part of him screaming somewhere deep inside, but he was too numb to move, to speak, to feel. All he was consciously aware of was one word that was quietly being chanted inside his head: '_No…no…'_ But that wasn't what he responded with. The logical part of his brain, another part of him that seemed to still be working without his knowing consent, caused him to blurt out "Wh….w-what?"

Riku looked down, away from Sora's panicked expression. His body was tense, and he seemed to brace himself before continuing.

"I'll understand if you don't want to be friends anymore Sora. I just thought you had the right to -"

'_No_...'

"No, not that! Wh…what about Cloud? What about my brother?!" he asked, just barely managing to keep the desperation out of his voice. Riku looked confused at him for a moment, before his seemed to catch on what he'd let slip previously. Sora couldn't tell, Riku was already so pale, but he seemed to loose just a little more color. He looked at Sora warily now.

'_No...'_

"Sora, I don't know how you feel about my being bi, but, I mean, haven't you noticed Cloud? I thought it was pretty obvious that he was bi too. I thought you knew about him." Honestly, Sora hadn't known that about Cloud, and at the moment he didn't care. His sole focus now was on how Cloud and Riku being bi had anything to do with each other! Riku saw the panic on Sora's face, and his determination came to a head. "Look Sora, I know you may not like it, him being your brother and all, but you know I've always admired Cloud and well…recently I noticed I liked him more than in a friendly way. He…Sora, he asked if I'd like to go out with him and I said yes."

'_No…no…!'_

Sora couldn't think, couldn't respond – he was barely standing of his own free will. He wasn't looking at Riku now, his gazed fixed on the ground, trying to make sense of the pain in his heart and what he was hearing.

"Sora…I'm so sorry. I hope this doesn't change things between us. Sora, can we still be friends? I know you hate Cloud, but, Sora, he's not all that bad and - "

_'No, no, NO!'_

"NO!" Sora burst out saying. On top of everything else, he was NOT going to listen to Riku, the man he loved, talk about his fucking brother, the bane of his existence!

"Sora?" Riku said, hesitantly reaching forward to grasp his shoulder. Sora knocked it away. "Sora, come on, what's wrong?"

'What's WRONG?!' Sora wanted to rail at him, 'I love you to pieces, but you love my brother!! MY BROTHER! The idiot I've hated most of my life, and you LOVE HIM!!' Looking at Riku now, he realized he couldn't do it; he couldn't take being around him one more moment. He didn't know how Kairi had gotten the strength to calmly accept his rejection of her, but he knew there was no way he could do the same.

Riku looked surprised and concerned at his obviously devastated expression, but Sora knew right now that he was on the verge of hating both Cloud and Riku. He looked down at the ground again, clenching his hands into fists.

"Go away", he said in a low voice.

"What?" asked Riku, incredulous that his friend was so angry. Sora had always been so caring, it was a new thing to hear such malice in his voice. "Sora please, don't be like this. Please, I don't want to ruin our friendship over this - "

"I said, GO AWAY!! You love my brother, go back to him!!" he shouted at Riku, bringing his hate-filled eyes to rest on his friend's wounded aqua ones. The pain was quickly covered by a cold mask.

_'No,'_ whimpered the voice in his head, realizing he'd hurt his friend, but unable, or unwilling, to do anything about it.

"Fine" said Riku angrily, "But this isn't over." He turned and walked away, out of the clearing.

And Sora was left standing there, his anger giving way to shock – the voices getting louder all the while until the 'no', that had never quit gone away during their confrontation, wasn't only in his head, and tears finally poured down his face.

"No….please, no…" he whispered brokenly into his trembling hands which now covered his face. "Please god, no…" he said brokenly as he fell heavily to his knees on the damp earth.

)()()()()()()(

Comments (appreciated), questions (considered), flames (allowed to burn themselves out).


	4. Semblance of Hell

**Author's Note!!** Sorry about not updating last time. I completely crashed after midterm T T so was unable to pull it together enough to write anything more. ; sorry. Thanks to everyone who's enjoyed the story so far; it warms my heart to know that people are enjoying it. Remember that a response is there not just to be critical, but also to encourage a writer **to** write. Sometimes we just don't feel we've got it in us, and those reviews can be a real motivator to keep pushing on with the story. So if you've got a favorite author or favorite story, remember to leave a response; helpfully criticize or just encourage them to keep trying. A little help can go a long way. That's all for this part .

**Warnings!!** This is a **yaoi!! **That means this has a **boy. kissing. another. boy!!** If that doesn't clear things up for you, **leave this story**. Seriously, I'm not joking, get out. Don't stupidly force yourself to read a guy making out with another guy just to then turn around and complain to your parents and the site. That being covered, there will also probably be language and anything from **implied gay sex/heterosexual sex** to **outright** sex. If this is too much for some of you, again, I'd suggest either backing out or just skipping those sorts of scenes. I'm not one for needless page breaks, but for those peoples sensibilities I'll consent to giving a warning before any sort of outright sex scenes, okay?

**Disclaimer:** Basically a statement about how I never have and never will own any of the characters or original Kingdom Hearts' story line's copyrights or anything like that. To whoever does own this, you're amazingly lucky, but to the rest of you, it's not me who's the owner nor am I making any sort of profit off of this. The only part of this entire thing that is mine is this particular story plot that I'm using them in.

Now with the preliminaries out of the way we can move on to the real reason you're all here . Enjoy!!

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**Chapter Four **– Semblance of Hell

_**"There are moments when, even to the sober eye of Reason, the world of our sad Humanity may assume the semblance of a Hell."- Edgar Allen Poe**_

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Kairi shifted and sighed. She checked her watch again for the third time in the last five minutes. It still showed that it had been fifteen minutes since Sora had gone to speak with Riku.

'Maybe I should go check on them', she thought absently as she tapped her foot impatiently. No, bad idea – if they were getting together the last thing she wanted to do was accidentally walk in on them making out. Yeah, like she really needed that as a permanent reminder of what she was missing, she thought bleakly.

She sighed and sat back down on the front step. The light from the porch was enough to illuminate some of the yard but left the cluster of trees shrouded. She was lucky that Cloud wasn't home right now – she could tell because there was no car in the drive. The last thing she wanted to do was try to explain her presence to that man, she thought as she tapped her foot impatiently. By the time another five minutes had passed she was getting bored and had resolved to go check on them. 'Well, I guess whether I like it or not I should go. So help me, if I see them going at it though, Sora's going to owe me – big time' she thought grumpily as she trudged through the initial foliage on the outskirts of the forest. She couldn't help dreading what she might see though, no matter how much anger she put into it.

Despite how things looked on the outside, she was still torn up about Sora liking someone else. It was even harder trying to pretend to be over it, but as much as she would have liked to have stayed away from him for months until she felt well enough to face him again, she'd noticed almost immediately that she just didn't wish to go that long without seeing Sora no matter how much it hurt. She liked Sora and she liked having him around, so no matter how much it hurt, it almost hurt more not to see him. It was like a drug almost; no matter how much it hurt her, in the end, she couldn't stay away.

Things were getting better though, she thought with a bitter smile as she pushed some tree branches out of her way. Well, things HAD been getting better. As selfish as it sounded, she was happy that Sora and Riku hadn't been dating. To have to see that every day would have hurt too much. This is why she was dreading seeing them now. She felt her heart might break all over again if she just happened to come across them kissing. Perhaps though she could find some excuse this time, like a job, to keep her busy so she would be able to avoid seeing them so blissfully happy with each other every day. Her chest hurt horribly at just the thought of having to endure them in their happiness while she watched on, desperately wishing it were her making Sora so happy. She knew it sounded selfish, but she felt it was safer to at least admit how she felt to herself rather than deny it all and risk acting on such feelings on accident. She wanted Sora to be happy – it was her favorite thing to see Sora smiling and laughing. It made her feel like darkness couldn't exist in the world. And more than anything, she didn't want to be the cause of him being miserable.

Her mind continued to turn these thoughts over and over again as she walked on through the forest, every now and then pausing to gauge where she was, until - what was that? That soft sound? It sounded like breathing of some sort. Was someone else in the forest right now? She didn't think she was close enough to the clearing yet, but maybe she had misjudged the distance. She moved more slowly forward, trying to be quiet so as to hear the sound more clearly. Yes, there was definitely someone here. But they were breathing…kind of…funny. Perhaps it was an animal and not a human at all? What if it **was **a human, but they were…what? Making out? …Ew, please no. Wait! Was that…it was! It was someone crying. What if someone was hurt? Fear shot through her, thinking that perhaps Sora hadn't met up with Riku because of some injury. She would think it odd later how not for a moment did she guess that perhaps it had been Riku to hurt Sora; but for now, she started moving faster as the sounds of crying became louder.

"Sora?" she called questioningly as she got closer.

No response but she knew that whoever it was, was near by. She moved aside a few more bushes, and found herself suddenly touching open air. She was in Sora and Riku's "secret spot". Her heart skipped a beat and she froze in place as she saw, sitting on the ground with his hands covering his face: Sora.

'Oh god, no…what is it…' she thought distantly as she moved slowly forward.

"Sora…" she tried again softly, trying not to startle him. He didn't answer her but his sobs quieted. His shoulders shook with the force of his tears. Tears stung Kairi's eyes; seeing the man she loved so dearly, so obviously hurt struck her hard. She bit her lip and knelt down in front of Sora. She gently placed a hand on his drawn up leg only to have Sora jerk his legs more tightly to him, knocking her hand away. She quickly clasped her hands together, but as she watched she slowly extended her hand again.

"Sora…what happened? Sora please, talk to me" she tried gently, this time ever so slightly touching his shoulder. She jumped slightly as Sora suddenly lurched forward and seized her around the middle. For a moment she was lost – this was Sora, and he was hugging her. He was holding her so close, and, oh, he was so warm. She loosely circled her arms around his back, caught up in the feel of Sora's breath on her neck, his cheek pressed to her skin, his scent of musk and earth…

"Oh Kairi" she heard him sob brokenly.

That was all it took to suddenly bring her back to reality. She could suddenly feel the vibrations from his body making her own shake, feel his tears wetting her skin through her shirt, and heard the harsh breathing breaking the stillness of the air. Her grip became tighter as her emotions went from wonderment to worry. What had hurt Sora so badly? What had happened that he was acting like this? She was reminded of Sora's similar reaction all those years ago when he'd learned of his parent's death. She refused to see him break that badly again. She idly wondered where Riku was, hoping that perhaps he could come and save Sora again – be the rock he seemed to need right now - , but then discarded this thought; if Riku wasn't going to be here for Sora this time than at least she would be.

Kairi rubbed Sora's back soothingly as his sobs gradually started to lessen and he started taking hiccupping breaths, trying to calm himself down but still having so much grief bottled up inside. She drew back a little, trying to coax him to meet her eyes.

"Sora, please, tell me what happened" she said softly. He shook his head morosely, refusing to say a word. Kairi took a breath to brace herself.

"Come on then", she said, attempting to comfort and distract Sora at the same time, "Let's get you home. A little food and some rest, and-"

"NO" he shouted, his voice loud and firm, startling Kairi. Nothing was said for a moment while Sora seemed to be trying to gather his thoughts.

"I can't…" he started softly, but stopped as his voice broke. "I won't" he started again, his voice still soft but firm again, "I'm not going back there Kairi. I'm not going to face that…that man" he said vehemently, his voice harsh.

"Who are you talking about Sora?" But he merely shook his head again. Kairi let out a frustrated sigh.

"Kairi, can I just…can I please just stay at your house tonight" Sora asked, finally looking up into her eyes.

Kairi froze, a million arguments for and against this idea suddenly rushing through her mind. She lived on the other side of town and it was late, surly too late to be going there now; but she knew her mother wouldn't object to driving to pick them up. You're a boy, I can't have you stay at my house, especially at our age – it would be suspicious, there's no way my parents would be okay with that; but she knew her parents thought of Sora like their own ever since his parents had died. He'd needed the comfort of a friend some nights, and it just became a natural thing for Sora to spend the night sometimes – her parents wouldn't have any reason to think anything untoward about the situation.

No, all of these arguments were peanuts compared to the real problem – 'I'm not ready to be that close to him again', she thought frantically. Could she do it? Could she really be okay with him in her house, knowing he was there not to see her but because something else was distracting and bothering him? She wanted to deny Sora, she desperately wanted to beg him to simply go to his own home, sleep in his own bed, rely on someone else's strength for this, but one look into his pleading, bright blue eyes – those eyes that she loved so much – and she found her self sufficiently cowed.

"Alright", she said, giving a heavy sigh and then standing up. "Come on. We'll have to go to the road to get a signal on my phone so I can ask my mom to come and get us", she said as she proceeded to help Sora to his feet. He hugged her suddenly again and whispered "Thanks Kairi."

After she got over her momentary shock she smiled gently into his hair and patted his back. "You're welcome." They parted and shared a small smile.

"Come on then", Sora said, tugging her hand gently to lead her back through the forest. "The quickest way to the road is this way."

"The road? Wait, Sora, don't you think we should go to your house first? You need your overnight stuff and you should at least leave a note for Cloud-" Sora stopped abruptly, causing Kairi to nearly run into his back.

"Sora, what-?"

"Cloud's not home" he asked her softly. His back was turned to her, so she couldn't see his expression but she could tell there was something…off about the tone of his voice.

"No", she said hesitantly. She watched as his back tensed further. "I'm not sure where he is, it's not like there was a note on the door, but his car wasn't there and-"

"Doesn't matter", he said abruptly as he began moving forward again, this time being not so gentle in his pull on her hand.

"'Doesn't matter'? What? Sora, wait. Sora!"

She tried to get his attention several times as he harshly shoved his way through the forest, but he either didn't hear her or was not going to answer.

Finally they reached the road. Sora froze; he seemed at a loss as to what to do now that there was no more forest to exert his anger on. Kairi jerked her hand from his angrily.

"Sora, I know you're upset but that's no reason to be so rude or behave like this towards me" she said hotly. Sora seemed to come out of whatever daze he was in. He looked at her, confusion clouding his eyes, but that slowly cleared as he watched her rubbing the hand he'd been gripping so fiercely during their short trek through the juggle.

"Kairi…" he said gently, regret and frustration mingling on his face, "I'm sorry, I just…things are just…." He expelled a sudden, frustrated sigh. "I'm sorry," he said simply.

She took in the sad look in his eyes, the defeated droop of his shoulders and decided sleep was long past due for them right now.

"It's okay", she said, "but you'll owe me an explanation later."

"Agreed" he said, giving her a brief smile.

Kairi flashed him a sympathetic smile as she dug in her pocket for her phone. Once she flipped it open, she briefly glanced at the digital clock before dialing her mom's cell. Ouch; it was almost midnight! Her mom certainly wasn't going to like having to come and get them this late at night, and no matter how much her mom liked Sora, she knew she was going to have to come up with one smooth lie to get him in the house without her parents being at least slightly suspicious – after all, they were loving (letting your daughter's distraught friend spend the night), not stupid (letting your 15 year old daughter's 16 year old male friend be in the same house at night, unsupervised).

But Kairi was willing to face that if it meant Sora could have a place to stay tonight that didn't upset him more than he already was. She thought about suggesting that Sora stay at Riku's place, but squashed that idea – 'Like I'm going to miss a chance to be his 'crying shoulder'', she thought, a part of her more than happy to be there for him.

As the phone finally connected and the sounds of a phone ringing could be heard through the line, she couldn't help but become curious and somewhat worried. Where **was** Riku? Was it really okay to leave if Sora hadn't met up with him? Maybe…maybe they **had** met up and that was why Sora was crying?

'No', she thought absently as she heard her mother finally pick up, 'Riku would never hurt Sora. Not like this.'

)()()()()()()(

Comments (appreciated), questions (considered), flames (allowed to burn themselves out).


	5. Color of the Spirit

**Author's Note!! ** Holy crap I am SO SORRY that it's taken so long for me to update this story! It's been a totally unreasonable amount of time, but my thanks to any of you that are still sticking with me on this. Thanks to all who have reviewed so far. I've appreciated knowing you're enjoying the story thus far.  Hopefully you'll enjoy the rest!

**Warnings!!** This is a **yaoi!!! **That means this has a **boy. kissing. another. boy!!** If that doesn't clear things up for you, **leave this story**. Seriously, I'm not joking, get out. Don't stupidly force yourself to read a guy making out with another guy just to then turn around and complain to your parents and the site. That being covered, there will also probably be language and anything from **implied gay sex/heterosexual sex** to **outright** sex. If this is too much for some of you, again, I'd suggest either backing out or just skipping those sorts of scenes. I'm not one for needless page breaks, but for those peoples sensibilities I'll consent to giving a warning before any sort of outright sex scenes, okay?

**Disclaimer:** Basically a statement about how I never have and never will own any of the characters or original Kingdom Hearts' story line's copyrights or anything like that. To whoever does own this, you're amazingly lucky, but to the rest of you, it's not me who's the owner nor am I making any sort of profit off of this. The only part of this entire thing that is mine is this particular story plot that I'm using them in.

Now with the preliminaries out of the way we can move on to the real reason you're all here ^^. Enjoy!!

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**Chapter Five **– Color of the Spirit

_**"Nature always wears the color of the spirit." – Ralph Waldo Emerson**_

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When Sora had the first stirrings of consciousness, he couldn't tell what had woken him up, but soon enough he felt his nose itch. He lazily scratched it and then settled back down to sleep, until his nose itched again. He scratched it a little harder this time, and then shifted for a bit in his covers before resettling again. He was in a light doze when he felt his nose itch yet again! This time he quickly shot his hand up to rub at his nose, but just as his hand reached his face he felt a brush of something fuzzy against his hand – something obviously hovering above his head. His eyes quickly jerked open and he gave a frightened yell as he glimpsed a black bat just before it swooped to land on his face!

He quickly reached up and tore it from his face, flinging it across the room as he jerked himself from the bed he'd been sleeping on. His breath and heart beat were so loud in his ears that it took him a moment to register the sounds of laughter behind him. Sora turned to see Kairi crouched beside an end table, still in her pajamas and clutching her sides, laughing so hard tears streamed down her cheeks.

"Kairi", he shouted angrily, "What's the big idea? Are you knuts?!" Kairi struggled to reign in her laughter enough to talk, but couldn't help the gasps and giggles that punctuated her next words.

"That gasp was priceless giggle…" Sora gritted his teeth.

"So glad to provide for your amusement", he said derisively, but he couldn't mask the pout in his words. After last night, he definitely wasn't in the mood to be woken up like this. Kairi spoke again when she'd finally stopped laughing.

"Aww, I'm sorry Sora", she said, giving him a sympathetic smile.

"Yeah right – sure you are" said Sora sarcastically, pout firmly in place, as he shook his head and moved through the open doorway on into the rest of the house, intent on reaching the nearest bathroom.

"Aw, come on Sora! You have to admit that that was funny", she called imploringly after him. Sora made a non-committal sound as he shut the bathroom door. He moved to the toilet, sighing as he relieved his full bladder before going to wash his hands and splashing some water on his face. As he dried himself, he looked at his reflection – nothing appeared to have changed. Part of him was expecting to see darker eyes, drooping hair, pale skin, and dark circles under his eyes; **something** that would show that horrible pain that still filled his chest even after the long night spent torturing himself over all that had happened. But no; his hair was still as pointed and tousled as usual, his eyes still their bright, deep blue, his skin still the same color it usually was this time of year (slightly pale from having been cooped up inside for school, but with a definite gold tinge to it).

No, nothing seemed to have changed at all. He couldn't help the anger and unaccountable sadness he felt at realizing that. He sighed and put the towel back. The bathroom on the main floor in Kairi's house had two doors – leaving out one made it easier to reach guest rooms, the study or the back door, the other made it easier to reach the kitchen, living room, dining room or front door. He debated briefly about going back to sleep in the guest room that Kairi's mom had made up for him last night. However, the sudden growl from his stomach pushed thoughts of sleep firmly out of his mind.

He stepped out the bathroom, mentally preparing himself for whatever he might face before he reached the kitchen. He didn't check what time it was before he left the guest room, so he didn't know if it was still early enough that Kairi's parents were still home – he hoped not. He knew he'd have to deal with a worried and curious Kairi today, he didn't need curious parents on top of that. When he reached the dining room he saw no plates were set for breakfast. He gave a sigh of relief – no plates meant no meal, and no meal meant there was a very good chance both of her parent's had already left for the day. He figured he shouldn't dally around Kairi's house much longer though. He figured the time was probably close to noon, and if that was the case, then Kairi's mom, being a social elite and having no real job, could be returning at any time. He resolved that after he'd eaten something and given a passable excuse to Kairi for his behavior last night, he'd leave. He wasn't quite sure where he'd go – he was still adamant that the last people he wanted to see were Riku or, providence forbid:

'_Cloud…_', he thought with a low, vicious growl. No, he definitely didn't want to see his "dear brother" right now; preferably not ever again, thank you very much!

Sora made his way through the dinning room, throwing a glance at the grandfather clock along the wall – ugh, it wasn't even 10 o'clock yet! Sora had been too upset last night to fall asleep as soon as he'd gone to bed; he didn't remember when he'd finally fallen asleep, but he could bet by how tired he felt that he hadn't had nearly enough sleep to deal with the problems that he'd undoubtedly face today. He had only been able to sleep finally after he'd simply been too exhausted to cry any more. Sora wouldn't call himself a cry baby (then again, not many guys would admit to such a title) but he felt he deserved to cry, all things considered. After all, it wasn't every day that you felt so thoroughly betrayed by both your only remaining family and your best friend/love of your life. Sora sighed, feeling the full weight of his despair.

As he entered the kitchen the first things he became aware of were the smell of coffee and cinnamon, and the feeling of the heat from the room enveloping him. It was always warm around this time of the day – just between cooling of from breakfast and preparing for lunch. He had always loved being in the kitchen for just such a moment; it reminded him strongly of Saturday mornings when his mom used to make an effort to make them all a special breakfast. She'd loved to bake and was sad that her job and her family's schedule had meant that she rarely would have the time to make such an elaborate breakfast. So she'd turned it into a family tradition to have a warm, full breakfast on Saturday mornings. He remembered that first Saturday after his parents' death, waking up, not to the smell of pancakes or the sound of light banging coming from the kitchen, but waking up to stale air and the utter silence in the house. He remembered the feelings of loneliness and sorrow that had crushed in on him in that moment, and how wretched he'd felt. It hadn't been the first time since their deaths, and it hadn't been the last time he'd felt that way. Even now, seven years later, he still felt that dull ach that was the loss of his parents.

Sora tried to distract himself from such a train of thought (like he really needed **more** depressing thoughts right now), and so he glanced around the kitchen, hoping to find some remnants of breakfast laying around so he wouldn't have to go through the fridge. Even though he visited Kairi and Riku's houses often enough to practically live there, he just never felt comfortable going through other people's stuff. Sora spotted a few cinnamon rolls still sitting out and made his way over to them. He exchanged a brief hello with the few cooks in the kitchen, asking if they minded him helping himself to what was left of breakfast. As usual, they smiled and told him to 'help yourself'. So he went about putting two of the rolls on a plate, then spooning out a bit of the cut fruit that was sitting in a bowl nearby. After pouring himself a small glass of milk he took a seat at the small table, making sure to place himself out of the way of the cooks. He didn't bother sitting in the dining room – he never liked sitting in that big room by himself and he knew Kairi would have no problem finding him here.

'Speak of the devil' he thought, as all too soon Kairi walked in, glancing about for him. He looked up at her long enough to see that she'd changed her clothes while he'd been in the bathroom – she was now sporting a yellow tank top with some blur capris and a simple pair of white flip-flops. When she saw him at the table, she quickly made her way over, giving brief hellos to the staff. Sora looked down at his plate, suddenly not so hungry. He listened with growing dread as a chair was pulled out next to him and Kairi sat down. He stubbornly ignored her and worked on toying with his roll.

Neither said anything for a long moment. He could hear the noises around them lessening until finally there was only the noise coming from he and Kairi – obviously the cooks could tell they needed a moment alone. Sora ignored this and stared determinedly at the mess he was making out of his food, while Kairi stared just as stubbornly at his head. Finally she sighed.

"So…"she started gently, "do you want to talk about what happened last night?"

He continued to stare at his plate.

"It might help if you do," she suggested.

"It's not gonna help, Kai", he said gruffly, but couldn't seem to stop himself from using her nickname, giving himself away – they both knew he usually only used his nickname when he was really upset.

"Just answer me one thing," she said, and he looked up into her pleading blue eyes, "does it have to do with Riku?"

His stomach knotted and his hands balled into fists on the table top. He dropped his eyes and didn't do anything for a long moment. Then he gave a small, jerky nod. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Kairi sat back in her chair. Both remained that way for a while.

Suddenly the chorus part of "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" ripped through the quiet, causing Sora and Kairi to both jump in their seats. Sora quickly reached into his pants pocket for his phone just as the song switched off. He pulled it out and flipped open the lid.

'Damn' he thought miserably as he stared at the words telling him it was Riku who'd just sent him a message.

"Riku, right" came Kairi's inquisitive voice. Sora's eyes snapped over to hers. "You're expression just now didn't exactly look thrilled." He sighed and stared back at his phone, his finger hovering over the 'view now' button.

There was a dull scratching of wood on linoleum as Kairi moved her chair out to stand up. He watched as she made her way across the room to the cabinet that he knew contained the snack food. He felt kind of guilty making her deal with this kind of drama before she'd even eaten. 'But it's not my fault', part of him whined, 'it's stupid Riku and gaul damned _Cloud_'s fault' his mental voice finished viciously this time.

He gave a frustrated sigh and finally agreed to view the message.

Are you still mad at me?

Mad? He thinks I'm mad at him? Sora stared at his phone as he let his mind wander back to last night. He really couldn't remember too much of what happened other than the basics – Riku bi, but dating Cloud. That's about where his mind kind of shut down. Just as he started pondering how to answer that question his phone gave another short burst of song before he quickly opened the new text message; from Riku again.

Try again: are we still friends?

Surprisingly, Sora had less trouble answering that one. He just finished sending off the reply when Kairi returned to the table, a breakfast bar in hand.

"So, you're probably not too hungry, but I kind of promised we might meet Selphie and the rest for lunch at the Diner. And I kind of want something more to eat than this" she said with a weary smile, raising the hand holding the bar. Sora returned her smile with one of his own, trying to make it less forced than he felt it was.

"Sure. I kind of don't feel like cinnamon rolls right now" he said, gesturing at the shredded confectionary on his plate. Kairi laughed and waited as he cleaned up his mess and put his plate and cup in the sink.

As they headed out the door, Sora couldn't stop his thoughts from wondering how Riku would take his simple reply.

_Yeah – still friends_.

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Comments (appreciated), questions (considered), flames (allowed to burn themselves out). ^^


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